Gwen's Problem Solved
Gwen came to my home one day and shared her recent encounter with God. She had became aware of a spiritual problem. Her feelings of resentment, hostility, guilt, and regrets had become a habit and seemed normal. After all she was human, she decided!
But that excuse quit working. She noticed such feelings hindered her fellowship with the Lord. She would confess her sin and fellowship would be restored temporarily.
She tried hard to change but failed. She grew disgusted with herself and decided to wait in an attitude of prayer expecting God to answer. Her heart was very heavy for some time. Notes in her journal read, "Time after time, Lord, I react the same way to the hurts, disappointments, and failures that I experience so regularly. Please, help me." Another day says, "I'm tormented by my failures, shortcomings, and ignorance. Lord, I do want to have a victorious life."
One day she thought of the Israelites wandering in the desert. She felt as if she were in a desert, too. She remembered how they grumbled and complained and she became very aware that she was doing exactly the same thing. She felt sober and ashamed.
Gwen realized her problem was her rebellion against God's will. The hardships and difficulties she had resented were His opportunities to reveal more of Himself and make her more like Him.
She humbly remembered Christ's words while hanging on the cross, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." Her heart broke and she earnestly determined to accept all that came her way as His will.
As these truths washed over Gwen's soul, she felt cleansed, strengthened and dearly loved. She gave thanksgiving and praise. Now Gwen says, "I can truly say I have been crucified with Christ."
Thank You, Jesus, for dying for us so that we also can live a crucified life.