Two Tested Keys for a Successful Marriage


When Daniel and I studied Song of Solomon we found several ways in this biblical guide to married love to help keep romance in our marriage. Although married life can settle into a routine, God doesn't intend for marriages to be in a rut anymore than He wants our relationship with Him to lose its creativity and enthusiasm.

We noticed that Solomon and the Shulammite's love included an element of the unexpected. Anything repeated over and over again can lose its romantic value unless it's occasionally accompanied by something new. Perhaps the Shulammite was intuitively aware of this, for she provided her husband with something new to enjoy as well as something already shared in their relationship (7:13). She constantly thought of new ways to bring joy to her mate.

Their love also included what seemed impractical. What king has time to wander through the forests of Lebanon mountains with his wife (7:11)? Creative romantic love is often stifled by the desire to be practical and reasonable. A friend told me she had spent hours painting a ceramic piece her husband had admired. "I would have never done it for myself, but it was worth it to see how pleased he is when I tell others I made it for my husband."

Solomon and the Shulammite realized the importance of small, spontaneous acts of love. From this song of lovers we get the phrase "The little foxes spoil the vine" (2:15). The little things in courtship made love flourish--the welcoming smile, that look of love in our eyes reserved only for him, loving words both spoken and written. The routine of day-to-day married life, however, can lull us into thinking that our love can survive without the thoughtful little love signals.

Our marriages have the marvelous possibility of reflecting Christ and His bride just as the love of Solomon and his beloved did. God's love can fills and fulfill our marriages. With His love, they will be growing, loving relationships from beginning to end.

Dear God, please make our marriage an attractive reflection of Christ and His church.

"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about Christ and the church" (Ephesians 5:31, 32).